Blood and Tears
by vintage memoirs
Summary: Drake's past comes back to haunt him so he does the only thing to make him feel better. But what happens when Josh finds out and accuses him? Deals with abuse, cutting. You don’t want dreams about this stuff don’t read it.
1. See if you care

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback.

A/N deals with abuse, self-mutilation (possibly), cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

_A little boy yells in pain as his body slams into the wall behind him hard. He falls down into a quivering heap, dreading the sound of the heavy boots making their way towards him. "I only wanted to play…," he says quietly as the man, now standing in front of him noisily unbuckles his belt and takes it off. The little boy curls up into a ball to block off the blows he knows are coming. He hears the snap of the belt then feels the blinding white pain shooting through his body. The boy screams out in agonizing pain._

Drake Parker sits bolt upright in his bed clinging onto his blankets and screaming the same way the little boy in his dream was. The teen boy clutches the blankets tightly and breathes heavily. Drake looks over at his stepbrother on the other side of the room and sees him still fast asleep. Drake sits back against his pillows and pulls his knees to his chest as tears stream down his cheeks.

_Another memory dream to add to the stockpile._

His body shakes lightly with each sob. After he composes himself, he stands up and climbs the ladder down from his bed. He quietly walks out of the room him and his brother share and sees his little sister walking out of her room. "What are you doing awake Megan?" Drake asks, trying to keep his voice calm and even but failing miserably as it cracks. He silently curses himself as Megan walks over to him.

"You were crying," she says circling him. "Why?"

"None of your business, now go back to sleep," he says continuing his walk to the bathroom.

"It better have been because of something I did," she says slowly strolling back into her room.

"Don't flatter yourself," Drake says as he quietly shuts the bathroom door. He walks over to the sink and leans on it, looking into the mirror. He sees his tearstained face staring back at him, his eyes full of pain and fear, just as they were so many years ago. He turns on the water in the sink and splashes his face with the cold water now filling the basin before looking back into the mirror. He shakes his head and sits on the ledge of the bathtub with his head in his hands.

_Why am I having all these nightmares? There's got to be some way to stop them…_

Drake looks up and sighs.

_Unless he's back again._

He slowly brings himself to his feet. He stands in front of the full-length mirror looking at his reflection. "Almost like nothing bad has ever happened," he says pulling the shirt he's wearing up and over his head. He looks in the mirror again, sees the reflection of his back in the far mirror, and shudders. Scars from every belt in the house. He lets his shirt fall back down on him and sees something shining on the sink. Drake walks closer and picks up the razor blade.

_I can't do this, I swore I'd stop. I can't do this… it's not like anyone would care if I did though, and it might help…_

Drake pushes the sleeves on his shirt up to his elbows and picks up the blade again. "What should I do this time?" he mumbles to himself as he brings the blade to his skin and drags it along the freckled porcelain white skin and sees deep red blood start emerging from the scratch. He picks the blade up and keeps scratching down his left arm and begins on his right arm, the whole time just enough to make blood come. When he's satisfied with his job, he takes a towel out of the bathroom closet and gently wipes the blood off, wincing in pain. He walks up to the mirror again, holds his arms out straight to his sides, and reads the cuts backwards. He smirks slightly. When he sees the blood is no longer coming from the cuts and pulls his sleeves back down. Drake walks back to his room and climbs back up the ladder to his bed. He lies down under the blankets, unaware of Josh silently watching him. Drake falls asleep within a few minutes. When Josh is sure Drake is asleep, he stands up, walks into the bathroom, and sees the bloody towel on the floor and a few drops of blood on the garbage can. He looks inside, sees the red stained razor blade, and goes pale. He cleans up the blood with a fresh towel, overlooking the mirror that Drake wished his image had been burned into. The image of him with his arms spread wide, fresh cuts on his arm reading;

_See if you care this time._


	2. Nothing's wrong

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback.

A/N deals with abuse, self-mutilation (possibly), cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

Drake wakes up to the sound of an alarm clock blaring. He groans and pulls the pillow over his head trying to drown out the sound. Unsuccessful at this he starts pounding on the clock with his fist. He hears the clock fall on the ground and break open. Drake sits up in his bed and slowly stands up and climbs down the ladder.

Josh walks back in the room and sees the half-asleep Drake slowly walking around the room grabbing his clothes for the day. "Hey Drake, you're finally up."

Drake looks up from his task and sees Josh. "Hey," he says in a sleepy voice. "What're you doing today?"

"Going to the movies with Mindy. You?"

"Movie theater. There's supposed to be some new chick flick out, which means lots of single girls," he replies with a tone of slyness.

"Hey, it is not a chick flick. It is a romantic comedy."

Drake looks at Josh and nods his head. "That's a chick flick."

"Whatever… but, uh, Drake," Josh asks as Drake turns his back to him, "Do you know by any chance who was bleeding in the bathroom last night?"

Drake's face goes to a worried expression as he holds his arm. He changes to an expressionless face as he turns to look at Josh. "No, I don't. Why, did you see blood in there?"

Josh carefully studies Drake's face for any signs of lying, "Yeah. And a razor blade covered in it."

"You mean someone's cutting?" Drake asks in a false worried tone.

"It's possible… It's not you, is it?" Josh asks accusingly

Drake harshly picks up his clothes again, "No, it's not me. I cant believe you'd ever think it was me."

"It was just a question, I just noticed it was there after you came back in the room last night."

"Well I didn't even go in the bathroom last night, okay?" Drake says as he walks quickly to the door.

Josh turns to look at Drake and says in a softer tone, "You know I'm always here for you if you need to talk."

"Yeah, right, " Drake says walking out of the room. Drake walks into the bathroom, locks the door behind him, and leans against it.

_I can't have him thinking I'm cutting. He'll tell mom and she'll send me to that shrink again._

Drake walks over to the shower and turns the water on.

_I'll think of something later._

Drake strips his nightclothes off then steps in the shower. He steps into the water to get his hair wet, closes his eyes, and sees flashes from his memory.

_The belt coming down on his back. His body slamming into the wall. Being pressed down into the floor. A steel toe boot coming at what felt like sixty miles an hour colliding into his stomach. The knife dragging across his smooth skin. The table breaking beneath him. The window breaking from behind him. The ground coming fast. The collision._

Drake opens his eyes quickly and steps back until he backs into the wall. He feels tears forming in his eyes and slowly slides down the wall to the floor of the bathtub. He closes his eyes again to let the memories flood back into his head. He puts his head back against the wall and lets the tears fall down freely mixing with the water from the shower.

Half an hour later Drake hears Megan pounding on the bathroom door. His eyes fly open as he stands up and turns off the water. "Just give me a minute!" he yells as his sister groans in frustration.

"You've been in there for an hour Drake! What were you doing, putting on make-up?"

"No, I don't wear make-up," Drake says as he grabs the towel off the bar and ties it around his waist.

"Whatever," Megan says as Drake opens the door and almost runs into her.

"Watch where you're going towel boy," she says walking into the bathroom and slamming the door behind her.

Drake walks back into his room, grabs his clothes from the chair, and gets dressed.

_Thank God, she didn't notice my arms._

Drake sighs and falls back onto the couch in an uncomfortable position. He looks up at the ceiling of the room and puts his arms over his stomach.

_Why did I have to get cursed with this family? They wouldn't even care if I went and killed myself._

Drake looks at the clock on the vcr and sits up. "Movie's letting out soon, I'd better hurry," he says as he jumps off the couch and walks out of the room, ready to keep up his act, like nothing's wrong.


	3. The dinner table

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback.

A/N deals with abuse, self-mutilation (possibly), cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

Drake walks in the house just in time for dinner. He walks over to the table and looks at the food on the table and shivers. "Meatloaf again?"

"Yes, meatloaf again," Audrey says walking around her son to put a couple more plates down on the table. Drake rolls his eyes and throws his arms out to his sides to see if she notices. When she doesn't he sighs and walks to his normal place at the head of the table and sits down.

Less than a minute later Josh, Walter, and Megan file into the room and sit in their spots. Megan sends Drake a suspicious look that he ignores.

_Josh must have talked to her._

Drake turns his attention back to his plate and starts picking at his food, separating what looks to be edible from the rest.

Halfway through dinner Audrey speaks up as usual, "So, how was everyone's day?"

Megan, sitting to Audrey's left goes first, "Besides Drake hogging the bathroom this morning, good." Drake looks up at Megan and mimics her silently. Walter sees and points his fork at him.

"Be nice to your sister Drake."

"Yes, sir," Drake says sitting back in his seat a little, making himself seem smaller.

Josh goes next. "Good. Me and Mindy went to see that new movie then went shopping for some new video games and stuff."

Walter next. "Same as always."

Drake's turn. He opens his mouth to talk but Audrey cuts over him.

"Work was great today! My boss gave me a raise and my holiday bonus today," she says oblivious to her son looking at her with his mouth open a little. Drake quickly closes his mouth and turns back to his plate.

Drake picks at the remaining food on his plate and sighs.

_No, nothing happened with me today. Not that you'd care. You never care. None of you._

Drake looks up at his so-called family, studying each of their faces carefully.

_I wonder if they actually do this to me on purpose. Maybe they just hate me. Everyone hates me._

He looks back down at his plate and picks at his food again. He stares at the meatloaf and beans becoming mixed together into a disgusting looking concoction. When he twists his fork around between his fingers it slips and falls on his plate with a loud clink and slides down onto the floor.

"Shit…" he mumbles looking down under the table at the fork.

Josh hears Drake and looks under the table when he reaches to pick up his fork and sees his sleeve come up on his arm and sees the scabs from the cuts on his arm. Josh looks above the table at Drake. "What's on your arms, Drake?"

Drake looks up at Josh and pulls his sleeves back down to cover the cuts. "Nothing."

"Drake, I saw something, don't lie."

"I had an accident, alright, it's nothing."

"Then show us."

"No."

Drake looks around at the rest of the family looking at him now.

_For once I get attention, too bad it's when I don't want it._

"You were cutting, weren't you?" Megan asks hesitantly.

Drake feels chills down his spine from the caring voice coming from his sister's mouth. "So what if I was?"

"Drake, I thought we were over this already," Audrey speaks up trying to reach for her son's arm.

Drake backs away and stands up so his mother can't reach him. "No, mom, we weren't. We never were, okay, that psychiatrist didn't do a damn thing for me."

"Drake Parker don't-"

Drake cuts her off, "Yeah mom, it's always don't. Don't do this, don't do that, be nice to your sister. Well, you know what, I'm sick of it!"

Walter tries a shot, "Drake, it-"

"Stay out of this, you don't know what's going on in my life. None of you do, you all ignore me."

"No we don't," Audrey says looking taken aback.

"Oh yeah? Tell me how I said my day was right now."

The four look at each other, seeing if any knows the answer to Drake's question, all obviously not knowing.

"That's what I thought. And you know, Josh, Megan, you were right about me cutting, I did," Drake says rolling his sleeves up. "And it made me feel a hell of a lot better, too, it always does."

Drake holds his arms out so his family can see the cuts.

"Drake, we do care," the four say almost in unison.

"Oh please, last time I cut you didn't even bother to find out why, mom."

"Yes I did, you were feeling guilty about your dad and I separating."

"Wrong. I cut because of him. You don't even know what he did to me."

"He did something to you?"

"Yes, mom, he did. I tried to tell you but you never listened to me," Drake says feeling tears welling up in his eyes, "I tried to tell you every time but you never listened."

"Oh, Drake, I didn't know he did anything bad to you."

"Yeah, right. You just let him."

"No, I didn't, now why don't we just sit down and talk it over?"

"I don't want to talk. Not to any of you, not to any one," Drake says his voice cracking. "I just want to get out of this life."

"Drake," Audrey says standing up, "We really need to talk."

"No we don't, I hate you. All of you,"

Drake feels the tears starting to slide down his cheeks and starts to walk away from the table.

"Drake, come back here," his mother says, trying to coax him into talking more.

"I don't want to, don't you get it, you already had your chance to talk to me!" He yells running up the stairs, taking them two at a time. He bursts into his room and locks his door then walks over to the stereo and turns it on loud so no one can hear him crying and collapses on the couch with his head in his hands, letting the tears fall.

When he hears a familiar song opening on the radio he leans back on the couch and lets the words fill his head.

_I am little bit of loneliness, a little bit of disregard, a handful of complaints but I can't help the fact that everyone can see these scars. _

_I am what I want you to want, what I want you to feel but it's like no matter what I do I can't convince you to just believe this is real._

_So I let go watching you turn your back like you always do. Face away and pretend that I'm not, but I'll be here 'cause you're all I got._

_I can't feel the way I did before. Don't turn your back on me, I won't be ignored. Time won't heal this damage anymore. Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored._

_I am a little bit insecure, a little unconfident 'cause you don't understand, I do what I can but sometimes I don't make sense._

_I am what you never want to say but I've never had a doubt. It's like no matter what I do I can't convince you for once just to hear me out._

_So I let go watching you turn your back like you always do, face away and pretend that I'm not, but I'll be here 'cause you're all I got._

_I can't feel the way I did before. Don't turn your back on me, I won't be ignored. Time won't heal this damage anymore. Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored._

_No, hear me out now. You're gonna listen to me like it or not right now_

_No, hear me out now. You're gonna listen to me like it or not right now_

_I can't feel the way I did before. Don't turn your back on me, I won't be ignored._

_I can't feel the way I did before. Don't turn your back on me, I won't be ignored. Time won't heal this damage anymore. Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored._

_I can't feel the way I did before. Don't turn your back on me, I won't be ignored. Time won't heal this damage anymore. Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored._

The song fades out and the disc jockey comes back on, but the words he says don't mean anything to the teenaged boy lying on the couch, wishing this nightmare life of his would just end. The boy closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep, knowing but not caring that another nightmare will come.

* * *

A/N - the lyrics are from Faint by Linkin Park. and i do appreciate the reviews .

keep 'em coming.


	4. No one

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback.

A/N deals with abuse, self-mutilation (possibly), cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

Drake wakes up to the sound of pounding on his bedroom door. He looks at his watch and sees it's eight thirty. 

"Oh crap, my band…" he says jumping off his couch and turning off his stereo. He hears his friend Trevor yelling for him.

"Hurry it up man! You're gonna be late!"

"I'm coming, go ahead, I'll meet you there!" Drake yells as he grabs his guitar from his bed and puts it in its case. He runs around the room grabbing everything else he needs, wrist guard, extra strings, picks. He hears the familiar sound of Trevor's beaten old station wagon pulling out of the driveway. Grabbing his guitar case, he quickly walks out of his room and downstairs into the living room and sees Megan sitting on the couch.

_She is the only one who pays real attention to me._

"Megs, you want to come with me?"

"Where?" she asks half-heartedly but still sympathetic as she turns to face her older brother.

"To the Shack, watch my band play…"

"Oh, no thanks."

"Alright, whatever…" Drake says slowly turning and walking out of the house. He walks to his car and puts his guitar in the backseat then opens the front door and sits in the drivers' seat. As he starts the engine of his car he looks up and sees Megan running out of the house, closing the front door behind her. She runs over to the car and opens the passenger side door and jumps in.

"I thought you weren't coming."

"So, I changed my mind. Deal with it."

Drake rolls his eyes as he backs out of the driveway and drives off down the street. Megan turns the dials on the radio to her radio station then turns it up loud. Drake glances over at his sister and speaks up, "We are not listening to this."

"Why not?"

"It's sugar pop, I don't want to listen to it." Drake reaches for the dial but Megan shoves his hand away.

"We listened to your music every day at home."

Drake looks back out the windshield and puts both hands on the wheel. "At least turn it down."

"Fine," Megan says reaching for the volume dial. She turns it down the smallest amount she can and sits back and smiles at Drake.

"That's not funny."

Megan laughs, "Yes it is."

"You like getting on my nerves don't you."

"You're my brother, of course I do."

Drake smiles at his sister singing along to her music and pulls into the club's parking lot. He looks up at the flashing neon light and sees his band's name there.

_Finally, somewhere big._

Drake kills the engine and opens his door and steps out. Megan looks at Drake. "The song wasn't over."

"You can listen to it later, now hurry up, I'm late."

"That's your own fault," she says stepping out of the car and walking around to where Drake is.

Drake opens the back door and grabs his guitar case and slings it over his shoulder. Drake takes off walking with Megan in tow around to the back of the building and into the back door. He walks over to his band, all of whom are pacing or practicing for their set. He quickly unlocks his case and puts his guitar strap over his head and plugs into the main amp then walks back over to Megan as he puts on his wrist guard.

"Megan, you've got to stay around back here, okay? If you need something ask one of the guys working here to get it for you."

"Yeah, fine, whatever."

"Alright, I'll be back every couple of songs too so if you need anything.."

"Fine, just get out there and play!"

Drake looks over his shoulder and sees Trevor motioning him to hurry it up and get on stage. "Feel free to come out on the side and look at the view," Drake says as he walks to the side to stand with his band.

Drake quickly tunes up his guitar and gives the song order to everyone else when he hears the announcer.

"…give it up for San Diego's very own Switchblade!"

Drake feels his pulse quicken when he hears the crowd screaming. "Let's show 'em what we got, guys," he says as he walks out on stage with his friends.

They all take their places, Drake up at the front mike. Drake looks out at the packed in crowd and smiles. "How's everyone doing out there!"

The crowd screams again, louder this time. The strobe lights above the stage flash in time with Trevor hitting the drums to get the crowd yelling.

_This is better than I could have dreamed._

"Great! This first song is one I wrote a long time ago," Drake says starting to pick at his guitar, "and I hope ya'll like it."

The rest of the band picks up the tune with Drake. He steps back from his mike as his music blasts through the huge speakers on either side of him. He counts out to his cue then steps back up to the stand and sings, partially surprised at how strong and smooth his voice sounds.

_I kiss your eyes, I say good night, my love is pouring out to you._

_I feel you cry, it's not good-bye. I'm only leaving for some time._

_I will see you again, don't forget I'm your best friend. I will see you again. So let me go, 'cause this is not the end._

_You know you mean so much to me. I mean, you make me feel like so much more._

Drake looks out at the crowd and his eye catches on a man standing in the center of the room holding a beer. Drake stops singing and hits a sour chord on his guitar and lets it sound out as he takes in the image of his father standing there, with his shag hair cut taking a long swig from his cup of beer and smiling at him evilly. Drake swallows hard and closes his eyes as the spit catches in his throat.

_The little boy tries to stand up and back away from his father more. He sees the belt in his hand and shakes his head when he feels the wall behind him. "Daddy, please, I didn't mean to…"_

"_Ugh, shut up you little brat," His father says landing his hand on the side of the boy's face._

_The boy whimpers out and puts his hand to his face. "It was an accident."_

"_No, you were an accident. You should never have been born."_

_The child shakes his head, "Y-you don't mean that."_

"_Yes, I do," he says folding the belt over and pulling the ends so it makes a loud snap. The young boys' knees turn weak at the sound and he falls down on all fours. He looks up at his father, his long brown hair falling in his eyes, his cheeks wet with tears. _

_If anybody else had seen this boy like this, this strong little boy reduced to tears, they would have tried to comfort him, but not Jack Parker. He had no regard for his own son. He smiles that evil and crooked smile of his as he raises the belt and brings it down on young Drake Parkers back. The boy screams out, knowing no one will hear him. When Jack's done with the whimpering heap on the floor he puts the belt back in the closet then walks back over to the boy._

"_Stand up."_

_Young Drake tries to push himself up onto his feet but shakes his head, "I can't."_

_Jack groans at his son's words and grabs a fistful of his hair and pulls him up to his feet. He whimpers, looking at his father and wipes his eyes with the back of his hand._

"_You're pathetic--"_

"Drake!" his friend, Michael yells as he shakes Drake.

Drake closes his eyes tighter. "No I'm not! Get away from me!" He yells, still caught up in his memory. He takes a swing and misses his friend by an inch, grasping thin air.

"Snap out of it, Drake!" Michael yells again, shaking Drake harder this time.

The teen's eyes fly open as he looks around confused. He sees he's not onstage anymore and takes a step back from the crowd around him. "I-I have to get out of here…" he mumbles quietly, pulling the guitar strap off his shoulder and handing the guitar to Michael. Before anyone can say a word Drake turns and walks out the back door. Outside, Drake looks down at the ground, something he'd grown used to doing and runs straight into a man standing in the parking lot by his car.

Drake looks up into the cold green eyes of Jack Parker and freezes on the spot. "Hello, son." he says uncrossing his arms.

Drake opens his mouth to speak but finds no words. He shuts his mouth and tries to back away but finds he can't move either, frozen in fear.

"Why don't we go for a ride and… catch up," Jack says giving Drake his evil grin. All Drake can do as a reply is shake his head. "Aw, it'll be fun."

Jack grabs his sons arm and pulls him around to the passengers side of the car and opens the door for him. Drake looks at his father again before complying and sitting in the passengers seat of his car, the one he bought with his own money. He flinches as Jack slams the car door shut and looks towards the back door of the building, wishing for someone to come out now and help him. When he sees no one he looks down at his lap and hands the car keys to his father, now sitting in the driver's seat.

_Why does no one help me?

* * *

_

A/N - I had a hard time writing this chap. Two rewrites..

So, yeah, if it sucks, that's why.

And my reviewers -

Astalder27, JamiePaige101, jhhhhjfjk89, The 8o's Lover - Thanks you guys!

IlovJesseMcCartney55, Heart Of The Wizard - Thanks you two. That's what I try for, to get you guys kind of into his head.

AlisonLydon - Thank you too. And I'm not really sure how it'll end yet, it really depends on what the ideas that pop up lead to.

Keep the reviews coming please.


	5. NEWS!

As some of you may have heard, Drake Bell was in a car accident. He has facial lacerations, a broken jaw, fractured neck and several missing teeth. He is in serious condition, but injuries are NOT life threatening. He went into surgery about 10:30 PM (EST) I believe, and reports from his mother robin is that he WILL be okay. She asks everyone to pray for his recovery. Drake will be recuperating for a few months while his injuries heal.

Excerpt -

"Drake has issued a statement to TMZ through Dan Schneider, the Executive Producer of his Nickelodeon program, that he appreciates all the calls and support but not to worry, 'Drake & Josh' will return. He thanks everyone for all their thoughts and prayers and hopes to be back in production soon."

Everyone, please, keep him in your thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery.

x.Mandy


	6. Reunion

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback.

A/N deals with abuse, self-mutilation (possibly), cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

Drake sits back in the passengers seat of his car as his father peels out of the club's parking lot. 

Jack Speaks up when the mile counter in the dash goes up a number. "So, I hear you've been having nightmares."

"From who?"

"Your little sister. I was backstage when your buddy pulled you back and I got to talk to her."

"What did she say?" he asks in a shaky voice.

"That you've been having flashbacks and crying a lot. Also that you cut again."

Drake looks out the window, "Oh…"

"Yeah. Looks like I got you pretty scared."

Drake says nothing in response.

"Nice to know it's all starting again, isn't it?"

Drake glances in the reflection of his father in the window and sees him smile evilly once again. He puts a shaky hand to his temple and closes his eyes.

_God, please help me._

,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,

Jack shoves Drake into a relatively empty room and sees him trip over the threshold. Drake sprawls down to the floor on hands and knees. He quickly pushes himself back to his feet and turns to face his father, knowing if he stays down too long he'll try something.

"You stay in here a few minutes, I have to get someone. They want to see you," Jack says uninterestedly.

"Great…" Drake mutters looking down at the ground.

Hearing the sound of the door close he looks around the room, seeing what he has. A small bed on one wall, a couple windows too high up to climb out of. A rolled up rope in one corner and chains attached to the wall by strong looking hooks. Walking over to the bed he sighs and runs his hands through his hair, pushing it out of his eyes. He sits down on the bed and lets his eyes glance over the ropes and chains again. "He's going to torture me until I crack, I know it…"

A second later the door opens and a girl walks in the room. Drake looks up and smiles when he sees it's not his father or one of his friends. "Well, hello there, angel," he says smoothly.

She rolls her eyes, "You're such a charmer."

He leans back on his palms, "Thank you."

"It gets you in trouble," the girl says walking over to him.

Raising his eyebrows, he takes in the features of the girl's face. "Hey, you're Keely, right?"

"How nice of you to remember," she says as she reaches Drake. Do you remember what you did to me?"

"Can't that be in the past? Why don't we give it a second try?" he asks patting the spot on the bed next to him.

Keely scoffs in disgust. "You're a pig. When we went out, I actually liked you, a lot I might add. But when I went to go fix my makeup, when I came back you were swapping spit with some dumb bleached blonde. The next day, you dumped me. If that wasn't bad enough, you did it in front of everyone!"

Drake looks up at Keely with innocent eyes, "I didn't mean it personally, I was just playing the field, you know."

"No, I don't know," she replies still angry.

"Then why don't I make it up to you?" he asks softly standing up. He quickly finger combs his hair as he walks up to the girl.

She rolls her eyes as he moves to kiss her. Putting her hands on his arms she holds him back, "Oh, don't think you're kissing your way out of this."

"What?"

"You know, I'm the one who called your dad back here, right? I found out everything about your life and he's your biggest weakness."

"Y-you called him to come back? Why? He's going to hurt me Keely."

"Yeah, maybe then you'll learn your lesson since nothing else seems to get through."

"Come on Keely, don't do this to me."

"You should have thought of that before you cheated."

Drake looks at the girl, almost pleadingly.

_How could she do this to me?_

"But, maybe when you're done with this little… training activity, I'll take you up on that offer," she says with a small smile.

Drake finds himself at a loss for words again as he looks into the girls eyes. She lightly pushes him back on the bed.

"I'll let you have some quality time with your dad now. Have fun," she says with an almost evil chuckle. She quickly turns and walks out of the room. Drake lets himself go limp and fall back on the bed and stares at the water damaged ceiling.

_Correction. They're going to kill me…_

_

* * *

_

A/N - Hey guys, sorry this update took so long. I've had some writer's block and some big projects for school and not to mention what happened to Drake, but, I finally got it done! Enjoy it.

And an update on Drake for you otherfans, he's home now. And he said that he's feeling better, thank goodness.


	7. Broken

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback. 

A/N deals with abuse, self-mutilation (possibly), cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

Megan walks in the house to a welcoming committee. Audrey stands up from the dining room table and ushers her daughter to a chair. "Megan, where were you? Do you have any idea what time it is? Where's Drake?"

"I don't know," the girl says fidgeting with her hands.

"He didn't come home with you?"

"No, he left the club before his band was done and never came back."

Audrey looks back at Josh and Walter. "That's not like him."

Josh takes his turn at asking questions, "He just walked out?"

Megan shakes her head. "He froze up on stage, it was like his friends couldn't wake him up either."

"Couldn't wake him up?" comes from Walter.

Nodding her head she replies quietly, "They actually had to pull him off stage. Michael tried to wake him up but he just yelled at him and tried to hit him. When he did snap out of it he ran out all scared."

Audrey put her hand to her head and sighs. "Megan, go upstairs, it's late and you need sleep."

"Okay, but wake me up when he gets home, I want to see him," the girl says standing up and walking upstairs to her room.

"Josh, you too," Audrey says looking at him.

"Mom, I want to help."

"I know, but you can't, not right now. Just go get some sleep."

"Okay, but get me if something happens." Josh walks upstairs.

,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,

Megan hears josh walk upstairs and walks out of her room so he sees her.

"Hey Megs, you okay?"

"Megan wipes a tear from her eye and shakes her head. "Drake's hurt."

,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,

Drake lies sprawled out on the floor, just the way his father left him. He clutches onto the cold cement floor under him, afraid he'll fall down with the rest of his world around him if he doesn't.

"D-dylan," he cries out softly. "Dylan p-please come back. I-i need you. H-help me…" he whimpers the words out.

Letting himself fade he whispers the name over again.

,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,.''.,

Josh looks from the small speaker Drake's voice is coming from to Megan. "Dylan?"

Megan nods her head. "Our older brother. Him and Drake were really close."

"How come I never heard of him?"

"He…he's dead." Megan says looking down at the table.

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

"How did it happen?"

"When mom brought me home from school one day we found Drake in the living room crying over Dylan. They were both bloody messes. Mom and Dad, our real dad, said that Drake and him were fighting and went too far, I don't believe that, they never fought over anything."

"It sounds like he's back there in his mind now."

Megan nods her head,"We have to help him."

"We should let mom and dad do this though, if he's hurt it could be dangerous."

"Josh, our brother is broken, he needs our help now."

"I want to, you know that, but we really shouldn't."

"I know, but I want to, he may be a boob but I don't want him hurt," she says in a small voice.

"I don't either. Listen, why don't we get some sleep, we'll figure out what to do in the morning."

"Fine…" Megan says sitting down on the edge of her bed.

"Good night Josh says, walking out of the room. "And, don't worry about Drake too much, he'll pull through, he's strong."

When Megan hears the door to Josh's room close she picks up her backpack and dumps her school books out on her bed. She quietly sneaks around the house and stocks her backpack with what she needs. "Sorry Josh, but he needs help now," she says more to herself as she sneaks out of the house to help her brother.

* * *

Sorry this update's so late you guys, but, here it is, finally, sorry if it sucks. Also, i got a name change. ()

reviewer corner (is that a cheesy name?)

IlovJesseMcCartney55, jhhhhjfjk89, astalder27, jumanji, VHS Chick, Punker88, Caz56, Heart Of The Wizard, JamiePaige101, SharpMathers, Hogaboom- Thanks for the reviews and I'm going to try to update sooner from now.

DrakeFan2009, oOoDancingQueenoOo, Soccerstar8281 - Horrible thing it was to happen to him. He's supposed to get the wires of his jaw soon-ish though, so that's good. And it happenedDecember 29th i believe.

AlisonLyndon - thank you and glad you liked it.

trinity4888 - Thanks for the review and I'm going to clear up the whole keely situation in one of the next two chapters.


	8. Bloody bullet

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback. 

A/N deals with abuse, cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

Megan leans her bike against the side wall of a small house. "It's a good thing I keep the boobs wired…" She sees a window cracked open and quietly climbs in it. Looking around the living room she sees it's empty and quietly walks down the hallway. Checking her watch she stops at the second door and takes a pin out of her pocket and picks the lock on the door.

Drake hears the quiet scratching in the lock and then the click and pulls his knees to himself slightly and hears shuffling footsteps making their way towards him and whimpers. He flinches under the touch of a warm hand on his shoulder. He covers his face slightly with his arm to block the person from seeing the tears. "N-not again, please."

Megan kneels on the floor next to her brother,"Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you."

Drake looks at Megan through his messy hair falling into his eyes. "W-where's Dylan, he used to help me."

"Drake, Dylan got hurt. He can't help you."

"He has to, he's the only one who could stop dad from h-hurting me."

"I can help you."

"Y-yeah right, why would you want to anyway?"

"Because I care about you," Megan says as she pushes the hair from Drake's face.

Drake closes his eyes and shakes his head, "Y-you're lying, I'm not falling for it again. Nobody cares about pathetic weak little kids."

"You're not pathetic or weak... well, not that much anyway."

"He said I was," Drake says tears welling in his eyes again. "E-everybody hates me."

"No they don't Drake," Megan puts her hand on her brother's shoulder again.

Carefully pushing himself up to sit and leaning against the wall behind him Drake shakes his head, "N-no, he's right."

Watching her brother wipe his eyes before covering his face Megan takes the backpack from her back and holds it in front of her, "Prove him wrong."

Drake leans his head back on the wall, "How am I going to do t-that?"

"Well, what do you want to do to him?"

"J-just make him go away."

"Like jail?"

"Anything to make him leave me alone."

Megan reaches in her backpack and pulls out a shiny black metal gun.

"W-where did you get that?"

Megan grabs Drake's wrist and places the gun in his hand, "Never mind where I got it, but you've got to use it."

Carefully inspecting the lethal weapon in his hand Drake shakes his head, "I-I can't."

Megan moves to sit next to Drake, "Yes you can, you don't have to kill him, just shoot him to keep him here." Seeing her brother looking uneasily at the object in his hand she gets a thought, "Dylan would want you to."

"Y-you think?"

"He didn't want you hurt like this right? Well, this is the only way to stop it."

"I-I guess."

"You can do it, I know you can. And just think, when you do you can make him listen to you."

"Yeah…"

Megan looks at her brother and sees him still avoiding looking her in the eye, "Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah, fine."

"Boy, he screwed you up, didn't he?"

Drake keeps his eyes glued to the gun in his hand as his fingers trace it. He hears Megan unzip her backpack again and spill its contents out. Feeling a cloth gently wiping the side of his face he whispers, "What are you doing?"

"Cleaning you up, I can't stand seeing you bloody," Megan replies wiping the remaining blood she can see from her brother's skin. When she's finished she leans back against the wall next to him. "Drake?"

"Hmm?"

"You're not so bad of a brother. I've seen bigger boobs."

Drake smirks slightly, "Thanks."

Megan nods her head then leans against Drake and yawns. Hearing this Drake puts his arm around her.

Instead of shoving him away like she normally would she curls up against him and closes her eyes.

A few hours after Drake feels Megan's breathing slow he hears the lock in the door click and opens his eyes. As his father's figure moves into the dim light coming from the window Drake quickly cocks the gun in his hand and takes careful aim at the man who caused him so much pain.

"Say hi to Dylan for me dad," Drake says quietly.

Before Drake can pull the trigger past the safety, Jack has his wrist tightly clamped in his hand forcing him to drop the gun.

Eyes glued on the gun, father and son wrestle with each other to get the gun. Drake stretches a long arm out and grabs it. Pulling it back to him the two continue to wrestle over it. As Drake gains the top position over his father the gun goes off between them and they both collapse, a small pool of blood spreading around them.

* * *

So, acliffhanger. Yup. Who's blood is it?

-announcer voice- 

Tune in next week to find out!

haha, anyways, yeah, i thought i'd give you guys a cliff hanger this time. btw, i like reviews. please keep it up

peace.out.


	9. Mistakes

My first Drake and Josh fanfic I decided to put up here. Be nice and review. I need feedback.

A/N deals with abuse, cutting. You don't want dreams about this stuff - don't read it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Drake, Josh, Mindy, Megan, Audrey or Walter.

* * *

Megan's eyes open at the sound of the gunshot and she sees her brother and father lying on the floor in the middle of the room, blood surrounding them. "Drake!"

When she sees no movement from either of the bodies she stands up and runs over to them. Pulling Drake away from the older man she kneels down and lifts his head up. "Drake. Drake, please wake up." Megan puts her hand over the bloodstain on Drake's shirt and notices there's no hole in the fabric and sighs in relief and hugs her brother.

Feeling the jerk as the girl pulls him close to her brings Drake back to consciousness. "W-what?" he asks putting a hand to his head.

"You're alive," she says softly.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

Megan rolls her eyes and helps her brother up to sit on the bed. Seeing his eyes fall on their father Megan puts her hand on his arm. "You had to do it."

"M-megan, I killed him. I killed my own father."

"It's alright, we can go now, we can go home, and you can get some rest. We'll deal with this later," Megan says helping her brother to his feet and, with stumbling steps, walk out of the room.

In the living room, Drake hears the front door open. Glancing up he sees the strawberry blonde girl walk into the house. Looking back down to the floor her hears the girl throw her purse onto a table and walk over to him and Megan. He flinches under her soft touch on his shoulder. "Get…away from me," he says forcefully.

Ignoring the boy's harsh remark she places her hand over his cheek and lifts his head to see into her eyes. She lets her hands fall down to the blood on his shirt, then down the bumpy scars on his arms. "Drake, I'm so sorry."

"Yeah, right. You knew he'd do this to me," Drake says slightly pushing Megan to help him away from Keely.

Moving in front of the boy so he can't walk any farther, "Drake, I didn't know he'd hurt you this much, I swear," she says with sympathy.

Drake looks into Keely's eyes with a cold glare. "You knew he would hurt me."

"No, not this bad, I thought he'd just scare you."

"How did you find out about him in the first place?"

"Riley… I called him and he thought you could use a lesson for doing that to girls all the time too, so he told me that you always seemed to be afraid of your dad. He didn't know how much"

"Yeah, remind me to kill him when I'm better."

Megan nods her head at Drake's request.

"No, he didn't know," Keely says quickly.

"He didn't know? He's known me since pre-school! I always had a limp, or a bruise, or something broken, he knows that. Whenever he came over my house we always had to run upstairs when dad was kicked back on the couch, downing a case of beer."

"He's stupid you know tha-" Keely says getting cut off by Drake.

"Yeah, and you're wrong for pulling a stunt like this for that. You know, I'm done talking to you. Let's go, Megan."

Seeing them walk towards the door again Keely puts a hand on Drake's arm. "Drake… Please."

"No. Now since you and Riley are such a damn perfect match, go and make out with him," Drake says pulling his arm away from Keely roughly and walking out the door with Megan.

Keely looks at the door for a few minutes after she hears the car in the drive pull away.

_I made a mistake. I want you back…_

* * *

Sorry for the delay of this. Also, if this doesn't make sense.. I wrote it while i was confused heh

reviewer corner

AlisonLydon, JamiePaige101, Punker88, jhhhhjfjk89, Xkinky-boots, Xwhiteninjetti, Heart Of The Wizard, VHS Chick, HollywoodGirl745, Hi-I'm-New, mushs-grl13, Hippielover459, imwithkoga13, Gabriella Montez-Bolton -- Thanks for reviewing guys. Glad you like the story and hey, cliffhanger's over, hope it turned out well. Glad some of you could kind of relate to it too, let's me know i did a good job

I hope i got everyone. Anyway, I'm going to start writing the next chapter after I finish this short one I started for my birthday, which was yesterday. Keep on reviewing

peace.out.


	10. AN

-shyly shuffles onto stage-

Hi there, my faithful readers. I'm very sorry for not updating this, but, truth is… I kind of lost my inspiration for this story. Along with my crush on Drake, and the Drake and Josh fandom.

I will try my best to write a wrap up for this so it's not just a dead ender. I'll try to have it done this week or next, but you never know. If anyone has any ideas for a closing, feel free to comment on it. It would be greatly appreciated.

I'm also probably going to start posting on the 'Supernatural' section here, with the stories that I have already written and am planning to write, so you can check my stuff out there.

Supernatural is, as you might have caught on, my new fandom. I'll miss the Drake and Josh one, but I may be back every once and awhile to read and such.

That's all for now. I hope to be back soon.

Ciao.


	11. One Month Later

_One month later…_

Drake sighs as he leans back into the soft couch cushion. Megan tears her eyes from the cartoon on the television to glance over at her brother. "How'd the hearing go?"

"Judge ruled it self-defense. It's all done, but they want me to go to counseling again." The face Drake makes, showing his displeasure of seeing a shrink makes Megan smile. It's good to see her brother back to normal – both physically and mentally.

"Sucks for you."

Drake nods in agreement.

"What about that girl?"

"Keely? Probation. Since she helped him, she was an accomplice. She actually left me alone finally, too."

"Shocker there," Megan mumbles, turning her attention back to the television screen.

Drake chuckles lightly. He kicks his feet up onto the coffee table.

_This is nice._

The boy runs a hand over his arm, happy that the cuts he had made had healed without visibly scarring. His family wasn't so bad, he'd decided. They just needed a little wake-up call.

A commercial comes on the TV, bringing the brother and sister out of their slight daze. "So, my band's having another show next week."

"You going to play that song you've been writing?"

"I'm not sure."

"You should, it's good."

Drake looks over at Megan. "You know, I'm still not used to you being nice."

"I'm not nice," she replies, picking a piece of popcorn from the bowl on her other side and throwing it at her brother. He moves to catch it in his mouth, giving Megan a self-satisfied smile when he succeeds.

"No, you're not to Josh."

"He's still a boob."

Drake smirks when he hears Josh yell in protest from the kitchen. The door swings open as Josh walks into the living room, "I resent that, Megan."

"Resemble," she mutters, just loud enough for Drake to hear, causing him to have to bite his fist to hold back the laugh building in his chest. "Deal with it."

Josh glares at the two on the couch before heading upstairs. A loud scream and crash follow about a minute later. Drake glances over at Megan, who's smiling evilly. "What'd you do to him?"

"Electrified the remote."

Drake shakes his head and laughs. "You're evil."

Megan just smiles and turns her attention back to the television.

_Yeah, my life's not too bad._

* * *

_**A/N**:_ _So, I finished. I'm terribly, terribly sorry for how long that took, and for the fact that this chapter's short. It tells what I wanted the story to do though, and now it's finished for all intents and purposes. I may write an "alternate ending" for the story that's longer, and quite possibly, better than this one. As I was writing this, I had a mini-brainstorm session and came up with a few good ideas for one, so I'll be sorting through those after I get myself caught up on my schoolwork._


End file.
